F 1059 




y\ foi/l coK5P»i^cy 




JoKu D arui kxj Po- {) I Uli e V 5 Roc Leifer M^ , 



JOHN D ANIHY, 

173 Central Avenue, 

Directly opposite the Entrance of N. Y. C. Depot. 

FINE IMPORTED AND DOMESTIC 

Fruits, Cigars n Tobacco. 

-A. FIlSrE LIISTE OF 

Prices as Reasonable as any other Hcuse in Rochester. 



Assorted Fruits put up in Fancy Baskets, suit- 
able for Travelers. 



rn 



HE INVASION 



C^]V"A-I3^, 



A FOUL CONSPIRACY, 



BJIOUUHT TO laW.UT BY 



AN OLD ARTILLERYMAN 



John Danihy, Publisher, Rochester, N. Y. 

[COPYBIUHTED.J 



\2"-'\\ 



^■^' - 



H^i 



(jl^riyh^ii ^ 



v=' 



,« 



^MP96-00735l 



THE INVASION OF CANADA. 



A FOUL CONSPIRACY BROUCHT TO LIGHT. 



The dynamite outrages that have caused such wide 
spread consternation in the city of London of late years ; 
the incipient revohitionary disturbances that have oc- 
curred from time to time throughout Europe and Amer- 
ica, the recent attempted assassination of Captain Phelan 
in New York, are the outcome of the half strangled 
hydra, Fenianism, which manifested itself here in 1866. 
If the British government imagined then that it had 
beaten the life out of the monster that threatened to 
wrest one of the brightest jewels from the English 
Crown, it has reason to think differently now — it has, 
indeed, more cause than ever, at this moment, to tremble 
for the perpetuation of its colonial system, 

Fenianism is to-day a thousand fold more vigorous 
than it ever was, and embraces in its ranks, not only 
the highest tyi^es of the Celtic race, but has drawn 
within its influences masses of the Anglo-Saxon, attract- 
ed thither from sheer force of sympathy and a repugnance 
to monarchial tyranny, that receives fresh impetus from 
new lights which are constantly flashing upon the 
minds of men, by means of the common school and un- 
restricted press ; and never before has this old world 



4 Tlie Invasion of Canac/a. 

had at its helm sucli powerful intellect, nor been swayed 
by siKdi massive genius. 

Education among what has been called the ral)ble, 
but which is in reality the bone and sinew of the race, 
appeal's for the hrst time in the history of our globe. 

The giants of intellect and reason are appearing upon 
the earth, whose watchword, culled from the bloody 
traditions of the past, resounds from the four corners 
of the world, and finds expression in that thrilling 
sentence 

"LIBERTY OR DEATH!" 

This is an age of conspiracy, and the time is ripe toi' 
unveiling the hidden secrets of the past. 

Reader — did you ever hear the particulars concerning 
the fall of Port Hope and Cobourg in 186() '^ or did you 
never hear that those Canadian towns surre adored to 
the Fenian leaders one quiet summer morning, in the 
year when Irish patriots carried the green flag across the 
border? If you did not, then this bit of history may 
be refreshing as well as instructive, and at the same 
time be prophetic in its tendency and fall across your 
path like the shadow of coming events. 

One quiet summer eveuing, three gentlemen sat upon 
the verandah of Craig's Hotel at Charlotte, N. Y. They 
were smoking their cigars and enjoying the cool evening 
breeze that came across the lake. 

Two steamers lay at the dock in close proximity to the 
hotel. They were the opposition boats then making 



The Invcmon of Canada. 



daily fci'ips to Port Hope and Coliourg, and were named 
rosj)e<-tively the " Lion " and the "Tiger." 

Two of the gentlemen alcove mentioned were officers 
Oi (lie •* Ijion," one being Captain Crystal, the com- 
mander, and tlie other, Charlie Craig, the agent. The 
third gentleman was an ex-Colonel of the U. S. volnn- 
teers, who had seen hard service during the rebellion, 
and wa,s at the time resting on his laurels, and a resident 
of Rochester. 

The steamer "Tiger" was owncl by Mr. Beaver 
iVlaple, of Cobourg, and was commanded by his son. 
Captain Pompy Maple, a young man whose bump of self 
esteem was very prominent, and who seemed to imagine 
that uake Ontario had been especially designed and 
creat'^^Ml hy Providence for the sole and exclusive navi- 
gation of his father's steamer. Consequently he had the 
greatest dislike, or rather hatred, of the steamer "Lion" 
and all connected with her, and truth to tell, the senti- 
ment was fully reciprocated by his gallant rivals, who 
had made every effort, both fair and foul, to drive the 
young captain and his father's boat off the route. 

There had been the usual war of rates between the 
two steamers, which threatened at one time to prove 
disastrous to both of them. 

The invasion of Canada, in which these steamers took 
an active imrt, must be our excuse for drawing the read- 
er's attention to them at this point of our nnirative. 



The Invasion of Canada. 




The Conspirators. 



A FOUL CONSPIRACY. 



As the blue smoke curled upwards from the cigars of 
Captain. Crystal and the agent, the ex-Colouel, (Dobbs by 
nam9) was recouafciiig his exploits of the war, and com- 
pifitig the tremendous events of the great rebellion with 
the^ foable demonstrations that had just taken place at 
Ridge way, where the Fenians had given battle to the 
Canadian forces, with such poor success. 

At the tinle of which we write, Canada was in a state 
of ferment, and the greatest disquietude prevailed 
throughout the Dominion on account of the hostile 
movements of the Fenians. The few Imperial troops at 
the disposal of the Canadian government were massed 
at certain points, leaving vast stretches of frontier abso- 
lutely unguarded. 

The air was full of rumors concerning the movements 
of the invaders, and as is usual under such circumstances, 
were grossly exaggerated, and it is not surprising that 
the inhabitants along the shores of Lake Ontario, un- 
protected and isolated, should have been in very poor 
humor or condition to show fight. 

In the course of his conversation, Colonel Dobbs re- 
marked that he thought, notwithstanding adverse cir- 
cumstances, the Canadians would prove themselves able 
to cope with the Fenian forces, especially as they (the 



S The Invasion of Canada. 



Canadians) had a well disciplined Militia and a goodly 
number of Imperial troops, to say nothing of the moral 
power of great Britain at their back. 

" Look, here !" cried Craig, when the colonel ceased 
speaking, '' ! will lay you a wager I can capture Fort 
Hope and Cobourg without firing a gun ! I'll bet a new 
silk hat that the inhabitants of those towns will haul up 
a white flag in token of surrender at tha approach of our 
steamer the next time she makes the trip, providing my 
instructions are carried out, and you will give me your 
co-operation in tlip matter." 

" I'll take that bet !^' cried Captain Crystal. " I will 
oo-operate with you," said Colonel Dobbs, ''if you prom- 
ise there shall be no blood shed in the affair, providing 
also yau do not ask me to violate the laws too much." 

''1 gne you my w(H'd of honor that not a drop of blood 
will be spilt on either side," replied Craig. 

" That being the case," cried the colonel, " I will lend 
you all the assistance I can to enable you to win your 
bet. What do you want me to do?" 

"You unist olitain the co-operation of some military 
friend, and botli of you appear in full regimentals, wear- 
ing as much green about you as possible, (if you can 
get the uniform of the-Berdan sharp shooters, it would 
be all the better), and report yourselves here to me at 

3 o'clock to-morrow afternoon," said Craig. 

./- 
"I hope you will not object to fall into line, Colonel," 

cried captain Crystal, laughing. " If there is any one 



The Invasion of Canada. ■ 9 

thing I stand in need of jnst now more than another, it 
is a new silk hat." 

"Then," cried Craig, thninping the table with his list, 
"if yonr only chance for a new hat lies in the winiriiig 
of this bet, you will never get one.." 

" ril agree to do my pari,"" s;iid Colonel Dobbs. "' I'll 
fall into line." 

'•And if yon win the bet, Craig," cried the captain, 
" 3^ou can telegrapli me at Toronto and I will pay the 
charges ; I shall be there when yon bombard Port llopp 
and Cobourg. I am going to the Queen city' on business 
that will detain me several days, and you will have full 
cliarge of the boat until I get back." 

" Mark my words, captain," exclaimed Craig, with 
much energy, "you will get the telegram, aiid dort't you 
forget it." The three then separated. 

At the appointed time Colonel Dobbs and Major Shif- 
fleheim, an old comrade in arms, appeared at Craig's 
hotel. 

"Good day, gentlemen, you are on time, I see," cried 
Craig, as the two entered the office of the hotel, " but 
where are your uniforms f 

" Here," replied the colonel, holding up a carpet bag, 
and a long parcel containing a sword. 

" Good," cried the agent. " Now go and get them on 
and remain in the bed room until I return." 

Craig then walked down to the dock where the steam- 
ers "Lion" and "Tiger" were lying, (iloing on board 



10 The Invasion of Canada. 



he spoke in low tones to the mate, engineer, and ship's 
crew. 

They all understood him and seemed to enter heartily 
into the great and solemn duties that were liefore them. 

An almost melancholy smile marked the features of 
the agent, as he gravely and without the least sign of 
excitement, gave his orders. 

Silently, one by one, the members of the crew entered 
the little apartment presided over the steward, from 
which they emerged wiping their mouths and looking 
as though they had just been put in possession of an 
important State secret. 

When Craig had arranged matters satisfactorily on 
« board his boat, he left, and immediately a large Irish 
flag was displayed in the bow of the " Lion," which lay 
about twenty feet from the stern of the "Tiger." 

Pretty soon the crew of the latter came up and gazed 
with the utmost astonishment at the green flag, em- 
blazoned with a golden harp, that swung proudly from 
the bow of the rival steamer; they couldn't imagine 
the meaning of it. 

Young Captain Maple swaggered a])ont the de<dv of his 
ship, damning the Irish and all who took stock iii them. 
Said he : 

'' I'd rather hang the devil's tail at my bow than a 
dirty Irish rag — I would like to see the dozen Irishmen 
that I couldn't get away with in half a minute," etc. 

Indeed, the young captain gave expression to a great 
deal of bombast, but he cooled down considerably upon 



The Invasion of Canada. 11 

hearing the following dialogue between a man on the 
whai'f and the purser of the steamer " Lion." 

" I tell yer," cried the man on the wharf, " you do well 
to hang out the green flag, for there's ten thousand 
Fenians right over the hill, yonder!" 

"Is that so?" replied the purser, pretending to be 
horribly frightened. 

"That's so, by thunder ! and there's going to be hell to 
pay and no pitch hot ; they'll take every boat in tlie 
harbor," responded the man at the wharf. 

Young Maple's knees began to tremble at hearing this 
talk and he hastened down the companion-way to go on 
shore and find out more, when he ran up against Colonel 
Dobbs and Major Shiffleheim, both in uniform, wearing 
green plumes in their hats and trailing their steel-scab- 
bard swords on the ground, looking like a couple of field 
marshals. 

The sight of these officers almost took the l)reath 
away from Captain Maple, and all he could say was, 
" Cord — a mighty !" 

Looking fiercely at Maple, but not saying a word, 
Colonel Dobbs pulled out of his pocket a tape-line, and 
throwing one end of it to th^ major, said: "Let us 
see if those four big guns can be mounted on this deck !" 

And then the two made a number of measurements 
and wrote them down in a note-book. 

" Major !" at length shouted the colonel from the far 
end of the boat, " you will send down that heavy ord- 



10 



The Invasion of Canada. 




Seizing the Steamer " Tiger.' 



The Trirasinn of Ctiiuidd. 13 

nance to-night ; cut away portiholes in the sides of the 
steaniei aiid niake all i^^nly. This boat will do admira- 
bly and will carry nearly a thonsand men. Get the arms 
and ammunition aboard and put a guard on." 

''(ientlemen !" at last cried Captain Maple, ''1 beg to 
inform you that 1 am captain and ov/ner of this boat." 

'H)h, you are, are you '? What is your name, please?" 
crietl the colonel looking at the captain through an eye- 
glass. 

'' My name is Maple," replied the young man trying to 
master his agitation. 

'Tut down that name in your book, major," cried the 
colonel. " Just write a memorandum, saying, captured 
the steamer ' Tiger,' owned and commanded by Captain 
Maple ;" and then turning to the captain he said majes- 
tically, " Just make out a bill against the Fenian broth- 
erhood for one steamer." 

'' But 1 don't want to sell the boat," replied the captain 
dismally. 

"Then we'll seize it in tlic liame of the Fenian army, 
and take you along with led the colonel. "And 

mark you — if you make any resistance we'll hang you 
to the yard-arm in short order. So you had better keep 
a civil tongu.e in your head, and when the guns and men 
are all aboard show us bow quickly you can pilot us into 
Port Hope harbor." 

So saying, the colonel and major stepped grandly on 
to the dock, leaving tbe captain and his crew dumb with 
amazement. 



14 The Invasion of Canada. 



"Come along, major," cried the colonel in a loud, 
commanding voice ; " we must get the guns aboard 
without delay. Let us go and give the necessary orders." 

No sooner had the supposed Fenian officers departed, 
than several men (instigated by Charles Craig), went on 
board of the " Tiger," and loudly berated the captain 
for allowing his boat to be seized without making an 
effort to escape. " They've seized the ' Lion,' " said these 
men, *' and put a guard on board. If you are not off in 
a few minutes a guard will be sent here also. Why the 
devil don't you get away ?" 

"I've got no steam up! How can I?" shouted the 
captain, shaking from head to foot. 

" Let go your lines and i^ush off into the stream, you 
darned fool, if you don't want to lose your boat," cried 
the men. 

The skipper took the advice. Craig's emissaries 
jumped ashore, and in a few minutes the " Tiger " was 
floating slowly down the stream. The engineer started 
a fire to get up steam. 

In the meantime Colonel Dobbs, the Major and Craig 
had got back to the hotel and were busy samj^ling a 
bottle or two of ale in an up stairs room and keeping an 
eye on the wharf. 

Suddenly Craig cried, " There goes the ' Tiger !' She's 
off !" and the three gentlemen roared with laughter. 

The colonel, who'was on the point of filling a large 
wooden pipe with tobacco, immediately ran down stairs 



The Invasion of Canada. 15 

and out towards a lumber pile upon a projecting point 
of land, close to which the steamer would have to pass. 
Mounting the wood pile, and as the ' Tiger ' slowly passed 
within a few yards, the colonel i3ointed his tobacco pipe 
as though it were a pistol, and taking careful aim at (Jap- 
tain Maple, who stood in the wheel house, demanded his 
surrender under pain of instant death. 

Captain Maple, upon discovering the colonel, and 
taking note of the deadly weapon he held in his hand, 
gave one scream and fell down in a fit. 

In the course of a short time the engineer of the 
" Tiger " got up steam enough to paddle out into the lake. 

The captain upon recovering from his fright deter- 
mined to take a round about course. He was dismayed, 
however, when he remembered that the " Tiger " was 
almost out of coal. Indeed they had been on the point 
of taking on fuel when the supposed Fenian officers had 
surprised them. 

In this dilemma there was nothing for it but to burn 
up everything in the way of barrels, doors, bunks, chairs, 
etc., which comprised the furniture and fixings of. the 
steamer. All the steam possible was put on and the 
vessel made good headway. As night approached, in 
order to avoid being overtaken by the steamer " Lion," 
(which the captain fully believed was by that time 
manned and armed by the Fenians), no lights whatever 
were displayed on the "Tiger," and in the darkness she 
steamed like a phantom ship on the wide waters of Lake 
Ontario. 



16 



The Jnrasion of (^oiada. 



t5 

c-t- 
CD 

XD 

m 

m 
m 

o" 




Tlie hwa>'^<- of Canada. 17 

Great was the joy of Cafji dn Mai^le when, at break of 
day, no signs were visibh • ( . i' the enemies' gunboat, the 
"Lion," and with a feeiitg of exultation at having 
escaped from the clutches of the Fenians, he steered his 
vessel in the direction of toliourg. 

Upon arriving there he ok used the greatest consterna- 
tion among the inhabitaists 1 informing them of his 
narrow escape. "Nothing," said the captain, "but the 
heroic conduct of myself and crew saved us ; after a 
hand-to-hand conflict we succeede-' \n beating back the 
Fenians who came to take possession of the 'Tiger.' I 
knocked the wind out of the comman !er and half a dozen 
staff officers of the Fenian army, while the crew reptilsed 
the vigorous attack of the troojis. Tl.'\\ were glad to 
get off the boat and run for their lives, wliile we got up 
steam and escaped. 

"The 'Lion,'" continued the valliant captain, "is now 
in ^the hands of the Fenians, and is on its way to 
bombard Port Hope and this town, having on board a 
number of heavy cannon and lots of troops." 

This news spread like wild fire, and in a few minutes 
the wires flashed it in an exaggerated form to Port Hope. 
The whole country round about became the theatre of 
the wildest excitement. 

Men on horseback scampered hither and thither, 
scattering highly seasoned reports of the approach of 
the enemy. 

The captain was the xion of the hour — a hero worthy 
of all lienor. 



18 The Invasion of Canada. 

Securing a horse this hero galloped off several miles 
into the country to his father's residence, to l)reak the 
news to the old man. 

"Behold me, father!" cried the captain, upon hin 
arrival at the paternal homestead, "as one snatched 
from the jaws of death !" H'e tlien commenced to tell 
the story of his escape. 

" Have you saved the l>oat V asked the parent, ignoring 
all sentiment and coming Iduntly to a sul)ject that 
touched his pocket. 

" Yes, I fought for it and saved it from the hands of 
the Fenians !" replied the son. 

" Come to my arms, my brave, my noble boy ; you are 
a chip off the old block, and possess the courage of a 
true Briton ; tell us all about it." 

Then the young captain told his parent how, by his 
own valorous behavior, backed by the loyalty of his 
crew", he had beaten off the enemy and saved his twenty 
thousand dollar boat. 

In the meantime, it soon became apparent io the 
inhabitants of Port Hope and C'olxun-g, that tlie means 
at hand were totally inadequate to repulse the enemy. 

Only one gun did Port Hope possess, which from time 
immemorial had done duty for saluting purposes, and 
no man could tell how it would act if loaded with a 
cannon ball or a heavy stone. Cannon balls they had 
none, and the only ammunition at hand was the powder 
sold at the stores for hunting purposes. Of shot guns 
there were quite a number, and also a few old military 



The Invasion of Canada. 



10 




20 The Invasion of Canada. 

muskets ; but of what avail could these be in opposing 
an enemy armed with 32-pounders and howitzers, backed 
by hordes of Fenians carrying modern breech-loaders ? 

Impromptu meetings were speedily held ]jy the leading 
citizens at both towns, and it was decided to blockade 
the entrances to the harbors by stretching across them 
long chains. This was soon done. 

The women and children of the two towns were 
huddled off into the woods in the rear, and men in 
bunches took to the hills, or vantage grounds, to await 
the appearance of the steamer " Lion," which it was 
expected would lay the town in heaps of ruins or secure 
an unconditional surrender of the inhabitants. 

What gave additional color to the reports of Captain 
Maple, was the non-appeara<nce of the '^ Lion " on her 
usual trip (she being laid over for repairs), on the morning 
of the scare. All day long the people of Port Hope and 
Cobourg scanned the horizon and every time a spec 
appeared it was declared to be the "Lion" with her 
hostile cargo. 

In answer to telegrams for troops from distant points, 
word was sent that assistance should be forwarded with 
the least possible delay. 

But the military were scattered at remote parts of the 
country and could not be withdrawn from positions 
already threatened by the enemy. 

The expected bombardment of Port Hope and Cobourg 
carried consternation throughout Canada, and many 
were the messages of advice and counsel sent from 



The Invasion of Canada. 21 

patriots afar off telling the authorities what was best to 
be done under the circumstances. 

Little consolation, however, could be obtained by those 
anxious to defend their homes and country along the 
shores of Port Hope and Cobourg. 

Some there were who declared their readiness to lay 
down tlieir lives in resisting the attack of the Fenians, 
but th-ese brave spirits were actuated to express these 
noble sentiments from a too frequent application of old 
" Rye " or "Malt," it being considered by those worthies 
an occasion that called for more than their usual daily 
stimulation. 

At Col)ourg the populace was roused to patriotic 
enthusiasm by the father of Captain Maple, who made 
the following speech to the terror-stricken citizens : 

" Men of Cobourg : — -Let us make heroic efforts to 
save our beloved towu from the hands of the ignoble 
enemy. Let us follow the example of my patriotic son, 
the Ciiptain of the ' Tiger,' who, notwithstanding that his 
vessel lay at the dock in the enemy's country, gallantly 
fought the invaders, who had the temerity to attempt 
the capture of his boat. Fellow Citizens ! Pardon my 
exultation at the nol)le conduct of my only son, hy 
whose brave and energetic action, we are warned of the 
enemy's approach. Let eacli mau arm himself with 
what weapons he can obtain, and let our l)attle cry be 
for God, Liberty and Cobourg !" 



22 



The Invasion of Canada. 



t> 

p. 

p. 
Kj 

CD 
W 

m 

CD 

m 

CD 

CD 
O 




The Invasion of Canada. 23 

This speech was received with loud acclamations by 
the people, and Alderman Carbuncle arose, and amid 
continued cheering said : 

"Fellow Subjects : — As you are all aware, this is a 
time that calls for all the patriotism we can muster, and 
as a direct descendant of an United Em]pire loyalist, I 
for oiae am ready to bleed, and if necessary die, in de- 
fending those glorious privileges which were handed 
down to us by our fathers. Need I say, fellow patriots, 
that one of the first and foremost of these privileges is 
our dependence upon and adhesion to the British Throne? 
Let us thank God that we are part and parcel of the 
greatest Empire the sun has ever shone upon." 

A V oice from the crowd — " But that ain't a goin' to get 
us out of our present scra^DC !" 

Alderman Carbuncle — " Oh, yes it is ! Do you think 
for a moment that Her Britanic Majesty, by and with 
the consent of the House of Commons and that august, 
ancient and most noble body, known throughout the 
world as the House of Lords, will see Canada insulted, 
invaded — not to say vanquished— by a horde of Yankee 
malcontents, who are at war with the fundamental 
principles of civilized society ? No, gentlemen, there is 
little danger of it. 1 give you my word that ere yonder 
sun shall go down behind the distant foliage, our noble 
town will be relieved by the invincible forces of the 
Imperial Army and no Fenian dare approach these 
shores." 



'24 The Invasion of Canada. 



Other speeches were made by prominent men of Co- 
bourg, which had the effect of arousing the people to 
the highest pitch of patriotism. 

In the meantime a spec appeared in the distant horizon. 
Every eye gazed eagerly in that direction and soon the 
cry went forth: "Here comes the 'Lion!' To arms ! 
to arms 1" 

Telescopes and opera glasses were brought into requi- 
sition. 

" The decks are crowded with troops !" cried one 
excitedly from the top of a wood pile. 

" I see cannon frowning from the port holes !" shouted 
another. 

" Boys !" cried Dick Bonniface, with a look that seemed 
to say — I might as well give my liquor to my friends as 
to have it all consumed by the enemy — " boys ! all hands 
come and take a drink ; it may be our last one !" 

" tluiTah for Bonniface !" cried everybody, and away 
they went, returning in a few minutes to watch the 
incoming steamer. 

Among the crowd were a large number of men, who, 
since the first reception of the news of the Fenian 
approach had improved tlie occasion for indulging in 
conviviality at different bar-rooms. 

Among these were many who had nothing to lose in 
case of a bombardment, while others had a secret de- 
light at the prospect of the country falling into the 



The Invasion of Canada. 25 

hands of the Fenians with whom they syraioathized, 
though they were careful to conceal their sentiments. 

These fellows had a good time at the expense of the 
timid ones who, in order to " keep their spirits up kept 
pouring spirits down," and setting them up for the boys. 

As the steamer approached, fresh evidences of her 
hostile character presented themselves in the excited 
minds of the spectators, who never ceased peering at 
her through every species of telescope to be found in 
the town. 

The brave and loyal Alderman Carbuncle took upon 
himself the command of the forces, and exceedingly 
fierce that gentleman looked with his scarlet face of 
pimples and imrple nose whose color was intensified by 
sundry and frequent applications of whisky-hot that the 
owner applied. 

Having marshalled his forces to the number of about 
one hundred men armed with shot-guns, rifles and 
pistols. Alderman Carbuncle called upon Dick Bonniface 
to pass around a few bottles of his best old rye, and the 
men having drank a bumper were ordered to take up 
positions amid the wood and lumber piles, old shanties, 
etc., as near the dock as possible. 

In an incredibly short time every man had vanished 
to his post, the citizens who were unarmed, the women 
and children who had not gone into the woods hid 
themselves in cellars and other places of safety. 

Not a soul was to be seen anywhere and a profound 
silence reigned throughout the town. 



26 The Invasion of Canada. 

Nearer and nearer approached the steamer. 

While a large number of the townsmen had been 
arming under the direction of Alderman Carbuncle, 
certain others, averse to war and its consequent horrors, 
had made up their minds to quite another liueof action. 
They argued — and not without some show of reason- 
that any resistance to an armed body of men, possessing 
cannon and the best of firearms, with which they could 
speedily lay the town in ruins and kill many of its people, 
was Mying in the face of Providence. They therefore 
made up their minds that as soon as the steamer came 
within cannon shot of the port they would hoist a white 
flag of surrender from the summit of the town hall. 

Procuring a bed sheet, they fastened it to the halyards 
of the flag pole aud at the proper time, let it float upon 
the breeze. 

This proper time was when the steamer sailed majes- 
tically into the harlior at her usual hour. 

Not a shot was flred at the steamer, which made no 
othe]' demonstration than to land a few passengers upon 
the wharf, and was upon the point of continuing Jier 
journey to Port Hope, when the arjny of Cobourg 
emerged from its hiding place and ran towards the 
steamer. 

Charlie Craig stood upon the upper deck smoking a 
cigar, and seemed to be in.tlie happiest of humors. 

"Hello, boys!" cried he, pointing with his finger to 
the great white flag floating from City Hall, " what's the 
meaning of that ?" 



The Invasion of Canada. 27 

The armed men turned their heads and beheld the 
token of surrender, while Alderman Carbuncle, after 
storming and swearing a few moments gave orders for 
some one to go and pull down " that cowardly rag." 

"What is the matter with you folks, anyhow? What's 
tlie trouble, and what are you going to do with those 
shooting irons ?" shouted Craig, trying hju-d to keep 
from laughing. ^ 

"Where are the Fenians ? Tell us that !" cried some 
one in the crowd. 

" I haven't seen any Fenians !'' cried Charlie Craig. 

" '^o Fenians ?" yelled out old Maple, " where's that 
son of mine ?" and seizing a big stick he went for Captain 
Maple, of the " Tiger," and swore he would beat him to 
a jelly. 

The young captain, however, realizing that he liad 
been sold, made a break for the woods. 

The people, seeing old Maple running with a big stick 
in his hand, commenced running with him also. 

The drunken citizens, seeing there was no necessity 
for war, fired off their pieces in the air, making a great 
noise and "causing a large number of people of the 
opposite end of the town to imagine the Fenians had 
landed. 

In the meantime, old Maple spied out his son and went 
for him, followed by a whooping and yelling crowd. 

The crew of the " Tiger," who were half drunk, seeing 
harm was threatened to their captain, tletermined to 



28 



The Invasion of Canada. 




The Invasion of Canada. "* 29 



protect him, and pretty soon there was a big free fight. 
As we Imve said, many of tlie citizens were under the 
it -pression that the Fenians had actually landed and 
were fighting their way to take possession of the public 
buildings and clean out the banks. 

Old Maple, who, having seen the merry twinkle in 
Craig's eye as . the latter spoke from the deck of the 
steamer, had taken in the situation at a glance, and the 
thought that his son had been the victim of a great 
practical joke for the purpose of driving him off the 
steamboat route, made him perfectly wild. 

Seizing his son by the coat collar the father shook him 
like a dog does a rat, calling 'him all the hard names he 
CO aid think of. 

Then some one, to increase the old man's fury, threw 
a head of cabbage at him, which, striking him in the 
mouth, made him still more furious. 

He ran into the crowd striking right and left, knocking 
down all who came in his way, which caused the fight 
to become general. 

Many were in dead earnest but a great number, for 
the sport of the thing, jostled themselves together and 
fired off their fire-arms in the air in order to add to the 
terrible confusion. 

In the meantime, horsemen at the other end of the 
town seeing the conflict, and being quite sure in their 
own minds that a battle with the Fenians was going on, 
scampered off to Port Hope with the news. 



30 The Invasion of Canada. 

The Cobourg telegraph operator, without any intention 
of further ahirraing the Port Hope people, innocently 
sent a dispatch to that town, saying : 

'' There is a big fight going on here !" 

The message, arriving at the time when the citizens 
of Port Hope were straining their"'eyes at the steamer 
"Ijion," then in sight, filled them with the greatest con- 
sternation, for it was evident that the "Lion "had landed 
part of her troops at Cobourg and would soon land the 
others at their own town. 

Men with telescopes declared they saw cannons on 
lioard of her and that her decks were crowded ^with 
troops. 

No one cared to remain near the wharf to be shot at ; 
and those that had no guns ran to the tops of the hills, 
among the trees, to witness the bombardment, while 
those who were armed with rifles hid themselves amid 
the lumber piles. 

News had somehow got wind that Charlie Craig had 
turned Fenian and was in command of thie hostile expe- 
dition ; and, as he was well-known among the Port Hope 
people, and moreover was a great favorite, it was deter- 
mined by a number of the leading citizens at the last 
moment that a white flag should be hoisted at the end 
of the pier, at which the steamer usually landed, and 
that a deputation should wait on Charlie Craig and offer 
terms ; thinking it better to surrender the town to one 
they knew than submit to a bombardment. 

" Let us be prisoners of war rather than dead men," 
argued the city fathers, " for at most we cannot remain 



The Invasion of Canada. .7/ 

long" in the power of the enemy, for the Imperial troops 
vvil] soon arrive and pi-operly cliastise the audacious 
Fenians." 

No one eare«l, however, io stan<i liy the Hag of truce, 
;i,nd in a short tijne the steamer "Lion'' swept serenely 
tiiTough tlie cliain l)arrier, which snapped like a cord, 
into lier phi.ce at tlie pier, when C'harlie Craig and a 
inimher of passojigers coolly came on sliore. 

They walked quietly along the deserted docks, (for 
tliose who had hid themselves amid the lumher piles 
were ashamed to come from their retreats), and Charlie 
Craig, going to the telegraph office, boiling over with 
fun, dispatched the following message to Captain Crystal, 
Queen's Hotel, Toronto : 

" I will trouble you for a new silk hat. 

Charles Craig." 

To which in the (bourse of half an hour the following 
answer came : 

"To Charles Craio, Port Hope : <* 

"You deserve the hat. Co l)ack home. Troops are 
mustering here for Cobourg, and you may get hanged. 

J. Crystal." 

It soon ])ecame known that the captain of the steamer 
"Tiger" had been the victim of a very unique practical 
joke. 

Orders were seiit to Ottowa, Toronto, Montreal and 
other points, countermanding the requisitions for troops, 
but too late. 



32 



The Invasion of Canada. 



02 
Q 

CD 



Q 



O. 

o 

CD 




The Invasion of Canada. 33 



Soldiers began pouring in by ever}" train, and Charlie 
Craig was wise in getting back to Charlotte as quickly 
as he did, or he no doubt would have been interviewed 
by some of the red-coated gentry, and made to stand 
treat upon a rather magnificent scale. 

And now, gentle reader, having given you the iDartic- 
lars concerning the fall of Port Hope and Cobourg, it 
becomes a i3ei*tinent question with all interested in the 
progress of Fenianism, to consider whether, in case of a 
future invasion of Canada, either of the aforesaid towns 
would be the most salient points of attack, or whether 
it would be better to enter Her Britanic Majesty's Do- 
minion by way^of Hudson Bay. Not in the winter time, 
gentle reader, when there would be a danger of being 
gobbled up by polar bears, but in the gentle spring or 
summer time, when, perchance, from excessive heat the 
Canadian military weazle may be caught asleep, and the 
Fenian army thus be enabled to pass unnoticed through 
the back door'of^Canada, and never be discovered until 
it was in full possession of Manitoba Province, from 
which point of vantage it might dictate terms to the 
whole civilized globe. 

The End. 



25,000 COPIES SOLD! 



(( 



MART'S GONE WITH A COON' 

SONGSTER. 



The Latest Sensatioml Song Book. 



OOKTTElSrTS : 

A Violet from my Mother's Grave 9 

All ou Account of Eliza 16-17 

Baby's got a Tooth 4 

Cradle's Empty, Baby's Gone 46 

De 'Sociation Ball 32 

Flower from my Angel Mother's Grave 39 

Going to the Hop this Evening 5 

Good Evening 40 

Hang up your hat behind the door 31 

Hi Jenny, Ho Jenny Johnson 35 

Have you seen Sarah ? 43 

Invincible Mick 41 

Little Wife Nelly 33 

Mary's Gone with a Coon 3 

McDonell's Old Tin Roof 13 

My Mother's Dear Old Face 18 

Mary Ann, I'll Tell Your Ma 30 

Mary, the Walker 44 

Mary Kelley's Dad 29 

Mrs. Brady's Daughter 45 

O, Fred, tell them sti>p 39 

Our Torchlight Parade 37 

Oh, Lucinda 19 

Put away that Straw 25 

Pat may be Foolish 12 

Sweet Forget-Me-Not 42 

Scotch Lassie Jean 8 

Sitting 'Neath the Old Oak Tree 24 

Sweet Flowers I Brought to You 20 

The Quilt My Grandmother Made 7 

The Colored Band 13 

The Twilight Coterie 14 

The Torpedo and the Whale 23 

Tell the Children Good-bye 22 

The Hole in the Door 26 

The Honest Irish Lad 27 

The Best Little Wife in the World 28 

The Man with the Seal Skin Pants 15 

The Dandy Colored Waiters 38 

The Old Fashioned Church 84 

U. S. Black Mail 21 

Wst, Wst, Wst, 6 

Why does Papa Sleep so Cold 30 

10 CENTS BACH; $4 PER HUNDRED. 

FOB SALE BY 

JOHN DANIHY, 173 Central Avenue, Rochester, N. Y. 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 

llllllillllllililillllllililillil 

016 215 261 



